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John’s Story - Preface My brother Brian said that sometime I must write the story of what he called "that odyssey" which marked my early years. Now, approaching my eightieth year, I feel compelled to narrate the journey as seen through the eyes of childhood, aided by an old family album of photographs. It is as factual as memory permits. If it offers a glimpse into a child’s life in Ireland of the 1930s it will have served its purpose. All the characters in it are real. All are no longer living, except me!John Ward Ottawa Canada December 2004. Chapter 1 Hello, John. Is this your photograph?Yes. What age are you? I’m going to be five in August. My, my. Five in August! And who is in the picture with you? Daddy and Mammy. Who else? Brian. And? Barry. And who is this? Charlie. John, you look very serious. Mammy combed my hair. And you’re wearing a tie. Do all little boys wear ties? Don’t know. Can I go and play now? All right. Off you go. ……………………… John? Yes? Can you tell me more about the picture? Don’t want to. Go away. All right. Another time. ……………………… John, I brought you some sweets. Gimme, gimme! They’re sticky. I like sticky sweets. Mammy never gives me sticky sweets. Why doesn’t Mammy give you sticky sweets? She says they stick in your throat. Well, suppose we don’t tell Mammy. Suppose I give you just one, then can we talk about the picture? Two! One now and one later. Gimme! Gimme! John, whose house is that in the picture? Our house. Does it have a name? Don’t know. John! Go easy with that sweet. Suck it. Don’t bite it! Now, tell me more about your house. Is it big? Yes. How big? It’s the biggest house in the world! John! It’s bigger than Jimmy Houston’s. I like Jimmy. And where is Jimmy’s house? There. Over there. Can’t you see? And is Jimmy your friend? Yes. He let’s me stay with him in the garden. Is Jimmy a grown-up? ‘Course. He works in the garden all morning. Sometimes he let’s me eat a bite of his dinner. Does Jimmy cook it? ‘Course not. His sister. She’s old. What’s her name? Jimmy’s Sister. John, your Mammy is calling you. I had better go. I want my other sweet. I want my other sweet. You said I could have two! Yes, John, I did. Put it in the pocket in your pants. And don’t tell Mammy! Now off you go. ……………………… Hello, John. Go ‘way. That’s not nice. Look. I brought you sweeties. Mammy says I’m not to talk to you. Did you tell Mammy about us? Mammy found the sticky sweet in my pocket. And what did you tell her? A man gave it to me. And she said I’m not to talk to strange men. John, do you think I’m a strange man? I know your name. I bring you sweets. Well—Mammy says. Is that Jimmy over there? He’s your friend, isn’t he? Yes. And I’m your friend. Right? Tell me, John. How old are you? I’m going to be five in August. Five in August! That’s funny. My birthday is in August, too. Daddy says he will have a surprise for me. Your Daddy must be nice. He’s the nicest Daddy in the whole world! And Mammy? Mammy’s not a Daddy. Daddy’s a Daddy! Tell me more about your friend Jimmy. What does he eat when he has dinner? It’s really soft. It’s mashed up in a bowl, with little red things in it. And pepper! You like pepper, John? Mammy says I’m too young to have pepper. When I grow up I’m going to have pepper every day! School. Do you go to school, John? Yes. Do you like school, John? I hate it. I hate it. I hate it! Why, John? Mammy took me there, and left me! Was that your first day? Yes. And I didn’t know anybody, and I wet my pants, and the teacher said I should have raised my hand, and I told her I didn’t know, and she was cross, and all the children were looking at me, and I don’t want to go any more! Here, have a sweetie. It’s a soft one. Thank you. My, my. Where did you learn to say that? Say what? "Thank you." Mammy. Mammy says we’re to say thank you when someone gives us things. I see your Mammy calling you, John. You’d better go. I’ll see you again soon. When? Soon. Tomorrow? Maybe. Off you go. ……………………... Hello, John. Remember me? Yes. You bring me sweeties. Can we talk some more? I’ll give you sweets! Now. No, after. Now! Now! Now! All right. One now. Tell me, John, what do you do in Jimmy’s garden? I help him. He helps me. We talk. What about? Bugs. And butterflies. And Old Diarrhea. Who is Old Diarrhea? He’s Old Diarrhea. Everybody knows Old Diarrhea. He passes Jimmy’s garden every day. Outside? On the road? Yes. Every time I see him I shout to Jimmy, "There’s Old Diarrhea!" Tell me more about your house. It’s scary in the back. And dark. What makes it scary? The bushes. But it’s not scary in front. Me and Daddy play in front. Just Daddy? No. There’s Brian, but he’s got homework. What’s homework? John, homework is something you’ll do when you’re as old as Brian. I’ll be five in August! Do you ever go out on the road by yourself, John? I can go by myself down to the gate. That’s a long, long way. All by yourself? Doesn’t Mammy or Daddy go with you? When we go out on the road to go to Mass. Do you like going to Mass? It’s too long. And it’s all people. I can’t see. But you are a good boy. Mammy skelpt me. Why did Mammy skelp you? I cried. She said I made a sturbance. Everybody was looking. Here’s another sweet, John. One of the soft ones. Thank you. I like you. You bring me sweets. And I’ll bring you more another day. Don’t go! Sorry, John. Must go. See you tomorrow. I don’t want you to go! No! No! I’ll be back, John. I promise. ……………………… John! A motor car! Is it yours? Yes. Mammy and Daddy said it was for my birthday. You’re five—a whole five years! Look, I push the pedals and it goes. And it steers, and everything! Can I ride in it? You’re too big. You’re far too big. Are you the only one can ride in it? Ciaran. Ciaran? Who is Ciaran? Mrs. Donahue is his Mammy. And do you like Ciaran? No! He takes my car to ride in. It’s my car! And what does Mammy say? She says I must share. But it’s my car! Mine! Mine! Mine! It’s a very handsome car, John. It has rubber wheels, too. Just like big cars. Do you still go to school, John? Don’t be silly. It’s holiday time. Well, what do you do all day? Play. Anything else? Feed the hens. Anything else? Gather apples. But Mammy won’t let me eat them. There’s an orchard at the bottom of the lane. Is that where you get the apples? ‘Course. And what does Mammy do with the apples? She makes jam. And jelly. How does she do that? She’s got a big, big pot, and she boils water, and puts in a whole lot of sugar. Then what? Mammy and Kate turn over two chairs and they— Who is Kate? Kate is Kate. And they put a sheet over the legs and a basin under it, and they turn the pot over and stain it— I think you mean strain it, John. Say "strain". Strain. And it drips out, and then they have jelly. I like apple jelly. Do you? Always. Jelly is better than jam. Jam has big things in it. I don’t like big things either, John. Do you know, you’re just like me! I don’t like gooseberries. They’ve got whiskers. Where do you get the gooseberries, John? There. Right in front. See! My, my. You know a lot of things, John. And I’m going to learn to read, too. Mammy reads me a story every night. But I have to say my prayers first. What prayers do you say? I say God bless Mammy, God bless Daddy, God bless Charlie, God bless Barry, God bless Brian. That’s a lot of prayers! Sometimes I forget one. Oh, and God bless me. We’ve had a really nice talk today, John. I’ll see you soon again. Didn’t you bring me any sweeties? What about my sweeties? You do remember things, John. I almost forgot. Close your eyes, hold out your hand, and see what God will send you. There! Three! That’s the most ever. But I don’t think God sent them. I think you’re pulling my leg! Me, John? Never. Yes, you are. I peeked. You put the sweets in my hand. You peeked! I tricked you! I saw you! You’re a scallywag, a real scallywag, peeking like that. Am not. Are too Ha, ha. I tricked you. ‘Bye. Come back you rascal! Bye, John. ……………………… Hi, John. What’s this picture? That’s me. And what are you doing? Feeding the hens, silly. Don’t you see? And who is that standing at the doorway? That’s Brian, my big brother. He looks after me. Do you like Brian? Sometimes. Sometimes he’s boring. Charlie’s boring. Barry’s boring. They’re all bigger than me. Sometimes I’m lonely. But your Mammy isn’t boring, is she? No. But that’s her job. Let’s look at some other pictures. Who are all these people? Don’t know. And these? Visitors. That’s the day we went on a picnic, down by the river. Who? That’s me, and Paul, and Barry, and Brian, and Aunt Brigid, and I can’t remember. The big people fished, and I wet my pants, and Mammy said I should have gone before we left and it was too far to go back to the house, and it was cold, and I hid behind Mammy’s back all day. Here’s another picture. I see eight little boys in it, and a priest. That’s Father Mnnamin. And another one. That’s Daddy. He comes home for dinner every day, and then goes back to work. I wait for him down at the gate, and we talk, and I tell him everything. Guess what! What? No, you’ve got to guess. I’m no good at guessing. You’ll have to tell me. It’s a secret! Well, if it’s a secret, don’t tell me. Don’t tell anyone. Once you tell, it’s no longer a secret. Tell you what, I have to go now, but I’ll be back. Not tomorrow, or the next day, but soon, and you can tell me the secret then. All right? All right, I hippose. What about my sweets? Next time, John. Next time. ‘Bye. ……………………… Hello, John. I’m back. Daddy took me on a train! We went a long, long way. Did you like riding on the train, John? I’m going to be a train driver when I grow up. There’s a big, big engine at the front. The engine driver blows a whistle. And there’s a big fire. And the driver sees way, way in front. And he waves to people in fields, and they wave back, and there’s a chimney, and smoke, and the train goes clack-clack, and the wheels are normous. What did you like best of all? When the whistle blew. It was loud. And the train went over a bridge and you could see a river. And, and— What, John? We went in a tunnel, and it was dark, and scary. Were you frightened? Daddy held my hand. Where did you and Daddy go in the train? To a big place with lots of streets, and we walked, and walked, and I got tired. Then Daddy carried me on his shoulder. There were lots and lots of people, and when we got there everyone was excited. Got where, John? Where the men were playing football. It was loud. It was louder than at Mass even. I didn’t know it was loud at Mass, John. It is when people up near the top sing. Mammy says she wishes some of them didn’t. Who was playing with football, John? Men. Did they wear coloured shirts? Yes. Were they all the same colour? No. Daddy wore one of the colours when he played football. And who won? Don’t know. I got tired watching, and Daddy got tired carrying me, and it was a long walk back to the train, and I fell asleep, and Mammy had to wake me in the morning. That was quite a day, John. Daddy says we won’t do it again for a long, long time. And Mammy says she’ll take me next time on a train, and I won’t get tired. She used a bad word when she was talking to Daddy. John, I think we have had enough talking for now. Guess what I have in this hand? Sweets. Sweets for me. You’re almost right. Guess again. Gimme, gimme. I don’t want to guess. Look! It’s a pipe. A licorice pipe. It doesn’t look like a pipe. Jimmy Houston has a pipe. That’s not a pipe! Oh, but it is. It’s a pipe you eat. Here, put this end in your mouth and bite some off. Now, what do you think? Do you like it? It’s a funny taste. It’s good. I like it. Wait till Jimmy sees my pipe! Jimmy, wait till you see what I got! ‘Bye for now, John. ‘Bye, Mister. ……………………… Where is this, John? That’s me in the sea. By myself. What are you doing? I’m sitting down. It’s a big, big pool. Do you like the sea, John? You can go pee-pee and nobody sees! And you can splash. And you can build sandcastles. I like building sandcastles. I’ve got a bucket, and a spade, and I fill the bucket and turn it over, and it makes a sandcastle. One day Daddy helped, and Brian, and everyone, and we made a normous castle. Where was that, John? At the seaside. That’s me, all by myself, sitting in— What’s the place called, John? Don’t remember. Ask Mammy. Look, here’s another picture. It looks earlier, John. You look littler. That’s me on Daddy’s knee. And there’s Mammy behind. And Kate, and— Who’s Kate? Kate’s Kate, and there’s Barry, and Brian. Charlie doesn’t look like Charlie— Do you go to the seaside often? Don’t know. Daddy’s going to take us somewhere else next year. Here is a big picture, John. It looks like— That’s me, behind the box. I’m the wicked keeper, and that’s Brian with a bat. That’s Brian! My, my. He looks different. He’s wearing long trousers, silly. Oh, here’s one I like. I know who that is. That’s you, and you’re feeding a little lamb. With a bottle. And here’s another, of a wee boy holding a cat, in a garden. Which do you like best, John, the lamb or the pussy cat? My pussy cat. I can cuddle my cat. Pussy cats won’t bite or scratch if you pet them. Wow! What’s that noise, John? It’s music! That’s Daddy’s wireless, silly. When he puts it on, people stop at the gate and listen. Sometimes I go down and they go away. John, it seems to me you are one happy little boy. You be good now, to Mammy and Daddy, and don’t forget to say your prayers every night. I have to go away for a long, long time— Don’t go! I’ll be back. I promise. And you will have lots more to tell me. Bye, John, for now. ………………………... Footnote: John’s house, as described above, was at Drumboy, outside Lifford. His school was at Murlog, where the family also went to Mass. The place with lots of streets was Derry City, where his Daddy took him by train. The river where the picnic was held was the Swilly. The seaside was at Bundoran. Kate is a shadowy figure, typical of the times in Ireland, where tens of thousands of single women, either widowed by the Great War of 1914-1918 or the "Troubles", eked out an existence, sometimes as live-in helpers. In surviving photographs she is always dressed in black. Kate may not be her real name.
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